Xi Jinping Seeks to Strengthen Ties with US, Offers Putin as a Sacrifice

Strategic Diplomacy

A Russian walks into a bank and hands the teller a sack of US dollars. The teller starts counting the money and notices that the bills are all very old and worn out. The teller says, "I'm sorry, sir, but these US dollars are so old that we can't accept them. You'll have to exchange them at the central bank." The man nods and walks out of the bank. A few minutes later, two men in dark suits enter the bank and ask the teller, "Did a man just come in here with a sack of US dollars?" The teller, recognizing them as FSB agents, nervously nods. The agents say, "That man is a counterfeiter. He's been flooding the market with fake US dollars. We need you to tell us everything he said and did." The teller replies, "Well, he came in with a sack of US dollars, but I told him we couldn't accept them because they were too old. And then he left." The FSB agents exchange a glance and one of them mutters, "Damn, we knew those counterfeit US dollars looked too real."

Disturbing reports have emerged from the Sochi bunker, indicating that the situation of the Fuehrer is not favorable. The individual in question is suffering from severe isolation and is continuously being fed false information from those around him. Despite mounting evidence to the contrary, the Fuehrer remains fixated on the belief in the Endsieg. His attempts to sleep are met with hallucinations of his victims, resulting in violent outbursts that involve screaming and jumping on walls. Even the administration of sleeping pills has failed to bring any relief to the situation.

Macroeconomic & Market Intelligence

After beating the "bad cop" represented by the United States, China is now attempting to woo the "good" European Union. In a recent interview, the Chinese ambassador to the EU made some undiplomatic comments that imply Xi Jinping has a foolproof bunker.

While the ambassador's message was delivered more tactfully, the implication was that China's claims of boundless friendship with Russia are merely rhetorical devices. This is a language feature meant to sway listeners rather than convey objective information, similar to the Russian idiom "speak for a red Slav." The US negotiations have proven too militarized for China's taste. The State Department's demands went beyond the issue of Taiwan's independence, encompassing the limitation of technological weapons, especially in space.

Capital Flows & Institutional Strategy

Consequently, China is now focusing on negotiations with the EU, primarily on economic issues and the Russian conflict in Ukraine. Beijing views French President Emmanuel Macron and European Commission head Ursula von der Leyen as potential allies who can help facilitate dialogue with the US. In exchange, China is willing to revise its stance towards Moscow. The significance of China's "rhetorical" friendship with Russia is evident from the trade figures. , China's trade with the US and EU was eight times greater than with the Russian Federation, illustrating that there is no real mathematical value in such a friendship. Rather, it is a rational calculation. In fact, China has already hinted at the possibility of "handing over" Putin for the sake of "international detente."

The Financial Times has published a series of political statements from Chinese diplomats, which essentially suggest that they do not trust or understand Putin, as he has lost his mind. However, up until now, these efforts have been met with resistance from Washington. It remains to be seen whether this will change in the future.